-profile- using slang/jargon/accent creatively

Profile A Profile B

GENDER: Female GENDER: Male
BACKGROUND/INFO/ BACKGROUND/INFO
PERSONALITY TYPE: University student PERSONALITY TYPE: Vegetarian
Rebellious Just graduated
Smoker Musically illiterate
Single Quiet
Guitarist Funny

FAVOURITE WORD: sloppy FAVOURITE WORD: crux
TIME/PLACE/PERIOD: Downtown Toronto; December 4th, 2006: Music Store

SITUATION: These two people are in the same section of the store. They notice each other.

M: (soft spoken) What a crux, eh? (nervous laugh) It's like looking for girls here in Downtown Toronto, ha ha...
F: (rolls eyes in disgust) Why I always gotta fined tha stupid mothafuckas who thank they funny? You thank you funny?
M: Damn. Only 21 more days till Christmas left. Tomorrow will be 20. Calm down. A crux you are. What music are you looking for?
F: Well, since ya askin'...
I'm lukin' fo this dope ass CD wit wicked instrumentation and melodies, naw mean? Tha lurics and beetz are craaayzee! I just don't rememba the artist. I only know how da CD cover be lookin' like.
M: Right. All of that is great. I'm just browsing for any music...that...has singing.
F: What? Datz it? I need a fuckin' ciggy right now...
You might as well be lookin in da what-da-fuck section of this sto' naw mean?
M: (Looks at guitar on her back) You play the guitar?
F: Would I be curryin' it if ah didn't? Straight up sloppy dawg...
M: Sloppy?
F: Yes foo! Yu deaf? Stoopid? Choose wun.
M: I'll take deaf for 200.
F: Ah shit, I needz ma ciggy.
M: I needs my vegetables.
F: Dang, yu wun uh dem peepuls that eat like carruts and grass and shit righ?
M: Vegetarian. They're called vegetarians
F: Whateva. Well, ah gotta get to ma class. You know how it is, big things poppin'.
M: Right.